Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
