those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Randomize
