Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Randomize
