what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
