Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
