What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
