If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
