Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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