were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
