This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
