I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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