Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
