you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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