Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
