TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
