I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize