Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I miss vodka workout Fridays
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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