girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
