is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
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