I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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