it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
