if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
