if i can run in heels then i can drive
id be glad to
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
