How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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