Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
this hospital has no fireball
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Randomize
