I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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