thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
