your thong is hanging out like whoa
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
