we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
you will always have a special place in my vag
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Randomize
