I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
You have to summon your inner elephant
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
