I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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