erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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