I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Randomize
