Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Randomize
