Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
He shit in the fireplace
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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