i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
