Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
