Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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