Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
where does the pee come out of this thing
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
