Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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