I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
he fucked my hip out of place.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
