I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Randomize
