they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
