I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Randomize
