i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
