just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
