whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
i've created a new STD.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
