Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
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