im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
