Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Randomize
