i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
